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Free Shipping, Free Returns, Free Exchanges.



  • The Important Stuff

Shouldn’t your company be called “the perfect jeans” ?

No, it shouldn’t! “Jeans” and “pants” in the plural form are an anachronism. In the 1200s, each leg of one’s breeches were separate garments. The two legs were then belted together at the waist. We can assure you that our JEAN comes in one piece. If you happen to be 800+ years old, we will consider making you a custom “pair of jeansssssss”.

Who are the chicks in the photos and videos?

Total strangers - they volunteered to be in our photoshoot after seeing our male models walking in Central Park. Despite Khaki Karl, we got their numbies!  

How does the perfect jean fit?

Slim Fit

Our slim is a bit slimmer at the ankle than your average slim jean. We think Mott and Bow is a little wide at the ankles. 

Dudes like to show some shoe nowadays. Sits low on the waist, slightly fitted through the hip.  F#!king perfect.

Skinny Fit

Our skinny is for skinny legged dudes who like em tight. If you think you’ve got skinny legs and like showing them off you’ll enjoy our skinny. 

You know who you are, you confident motherf#!cker.

Slim Thick

A looser, more casual slim. More like a traditional 'straight' cut. Gives just a little bit extra room. Not quite slim, not quite thick. Just right.

Athletic Fit

Our Athletic Fit is designed for those Tree Trunk Thighs and Colossal Calves. If you're thiccc (or just vibe looser cuts), and are looking for combined comfort and style, these are for you. #bigsexy"


Cut like Slim Thick, but wider at the anklle so your boot fits right. Cut. For. Boots. Bootcut. Yippie Kai Yay Cowboy!

Checkout our fit and size guide here

How do I take care of my perfect jean?

For Perfect Men

Ideally, wash inside out in cold water and hang to air-dry.

For Imperfect Men

Throw them suckers in the laundry like the rest of your clothes (best to dry on LOW heat). Or don’t wash them at all (like the rest of your fucking clothes). Our fabric is durable and will do just fine. (NOTE: Bandit/Black should always be washed inside out)

Will my jean stretch or shrink?

Like all premium denim, our jean will increase about ½ a size through wearing and then return to original form when washed. Try to wash COLD and dry on LOW heat.

What kind of clothing do you make at TPJ?

TPJ + Clothing = TPJ Clothing. Our core principals are simple: 

Make clothes that men want to wear

Make SUPER comfortable clothes (often with a bit of stretch)

Be Sustainable.  Every piece of apparel we make at TPJ should be durable and last quite a long time with normal use (ie, wearing it once or twice a week or so). 

Have a good time :) TPJ Clothing should be fun for us to make and market AND fun to wear and brag about to friends.

  • Shipping Returns & Exchanges

How do I exchange or return my jean?

Returns and exchanges within 30 days of shipment are free!   

To setup a return or exchange goto our Perfect Return/Exchange Portal at   The portal gently guides you (think soothing thoughts)  through the return/exchange process (it's real easy).  You'll choose whether you're returning or swapping for a new size, wash, or cut.  We'll provide a prepaid shipping label too (so good - jeanius!).

Exchanges typically ship shortly after the product is received/reviewed at our warehouse.  

Refunds are initiated after a quick inspection at the warehouse.  Funds typically arrive back within 5 biz days (though occasionally longer - we've seen 14 days+ on rare occasions). 

Got a question about returns/exchanges or just need a hand?  Email with your order id.  We got you.  

Read more at our returns, refund & exchanges policy (the legalese). 

How long will it take to receive my order?

Free Shipping

Orders typically arrive within 3-7 business days with free shipping.

Express Shipping

Express shipping typically takes 2-3 business days (depending on when the order is placed).  

How long will it take for my refund to be processed?

It generally takes 3-5 business days from the time we receive the return at our warehouse.  Your bank may process it a bit faster or slower.

Please email our jeanius desk, if you’re refund has not been processed within 2 weeks of return shipment.  

Where's my package?

Your currently crushed nuts are between your legs.  Your shipment tracking info (with uncrushed nuts) can be find in your shipping email.

Please contact us directly if you did not receive the tracking info.

Please contact the carrier directly for a change of address or an immediate status update:

USPS Tracking: 1-800-222-1811

Fedex Tracking: 1-800-463-3339

DHL Tracking:1-800-805-9306


All orders ship within 1-2 business days (often same day - we're fast). 

What if I need to change or cancel my order?

Email our jeaniuses at with the subject line “I Fucked Up, Please Help!” and we will get back to shortly. Or just use a regular subject line and email :)

What countries do you ship to?

Currently, only the good ol’ US of A (48 continental states, Alaska, Hawaii and domestic APO addresses).

But good news! By 2022 we're be setup to ship to:


We're psyched to welcome our new friends abroad to uncrushed nut living :)

  • Other Stuff

How can I contact you?

Got another question? Just want to chat / talk denim (umm)

Email us at or head to our contact us page. We respond quickly :)